Monday, September 22, 2008

A Mother's Message to Her Baby - the Daughter of a Newly-Diagnosed MS Patient

During pregnancy, certain protein and corticosteroid levels are elevated producing an immunosuppressant effect.  MS exacerbation rates tend to rise in the three to six months postpartum and the risk of a relapse is estimated to be 20-40% after childbirth, according to the National Multiple Sclerosis Society.

Amanda is the new mother of a beautiful six month old daughter, Hazel.  Amanda began experiencing pins/needles and numbness in her hands and on her torso at the very beginning of September.  She consulted with her doctor on September 11 which began her path to diagnosis.  Her lumbar puncture was on Thursday and she is awaiting the results.

Here is a beautiful note which Amanda wrote to her young daughter in the blog which is to be Hazel's first-year baby book.  I'm sure that there are plenty of mothers who can relate.

I hate writing these updates, especially since it is all going downhill for me.  But I cannot stop writing, and I cannot stop this blog, as much as I would like to crawl into bed and never come out.  I am compelled to record for Hazel the first year of her life, in all its detail.  This is something that is going to effect her forever, and will shape her life and personality.  I want her to know where it all started.  And that it all started on September 11, 2008.  And that the first six months of her life were lived in blissful ignorance and all-consuming love.  I know she won't remember that, but Hazel, if you are reading this sometime in the far future looking for some kind of insight into me or you or us, know that the first six months of your life were filled with snuggles, naps, giggles, tickles, games, dancing, singing, friends and family.  The only thing I ever want for you is for that to continue.  Most of it will, certainly you will remain the most loved child there ever was, but things will probably change from here on out. You wont be aware of it though, and whether its a blessing or not I don't know.  All I know is that from your perspective, in your memory, you will always have been someone who's mother has multiple sclerosis.  But know that you weren't.


  1. Poignant and sad. It makes my troubles seem small.

  2. thank you, lisa. lumbar puncture results are back, and im slapped in the face with a big ole' bag of MS. so off we go...solumedrol infusions and copoxone galore. *sigh* but hazel cut her first tooth so life is beautiful.