Tuesday, November 22, 2011

My Recent Relapse

Living in Denial

In the past week or more, I have been feeling not my best.  Each day symptoms would begin to flare and I would hope to wake up the next morning feeling better.  One such evening, it was my eyes which were out of whack.  The color pink was beginning to fade, but the next morning things were back to normal.  There was no pain to report but one eye did appear darker than the other.  (Denial.)

More annoyingly, spasticity has been increasing behind my left leg.  The muscles have felt knotted and trying to stretch them out has been painful.  Baclofen had returned to a twice a day medication with modest benefit.  For me, when spasticity increases, my knees begin to hurt from the increased pull on them.  Living with joint pain anyways, that is one which takes me a while to associate in a timely fashion.  (Denial.)

I started having more difficulty getting up from a seated position and walking up the stairs.  I didn’t come up with a good excuse for that but just thought my symptoms were “acting up.”  But Thursday’s yoga class was very difficult for me.  My legs tried to convince me that I weighed two tons, but I told them back that there were sorely mistaken.  Some of the stretches focusing on the legs almost made me want to tear up.  (Less denial.)

Read this post in its entirety:

Denying Denial: Admitting to an MS Relapse and Taking Action

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